So Apple is holding a big media event tomorrow and word on the street is that this will be a real humdinger, with all signs pointing to new iPhones, the imminent release of iOS 8, and a new “wearable” product category, probably a watch.

As a longtime professional Macadmin, I am contractually obligated to follow the media frenzy in the runup to this event, and to watch the presentation itself. Unlike a couple of my fancy-colleagues who scored tickets to see it live in Cupertino, I will be with the other plebes at work, coffee in hand, streaming the show to a conference room. The morning will be full of rampant speculation, oohs and  ahs, nods of approval, headshakes, gasps of disbelief, general mockery, and live-tweets galore, and the joke’s on those other guys, because at least I don’t have to wake up at 5:00 am to get to Cupertino!

Anyway, I won’t rehash the all-but-certain rumors that have been making their rounds for weeks now. Instead I’ll lay out a handful of my own out-there predictions for you to digest.

1. There will be a watch, but it won’t be called iWatch. There will be multiple sizes and prices. The entry level price point will be $299.
2. There will be another, more affordable wearable of some kind, maybe like a FitBit, or Care Predict Tempo. This would not have all the features of the watch, but would be more of a health and/or fitness device.
3. The wearable(s) will be branded Beats instead of, or in addition to, Apple.
4. There will be at least one woman on stage during the event, which is notable because these things are usually sausage-fests. Maybe Angela Ahrendts?
5. Siri will be featured and a major highlight of the new watch/wearable(s). I think the “Wish We Could Say More” text on the media invitation alludes to this, though I haven’t seen anyone else pick up on it.
6. Apple will announce a mobile payments system and it will allow payments from the watch without carrying your phone.
7. In the wake of the celebrity picture hacking scandal, Tim Cook will discuss upcoming iCloud security measures.
8. CarPlay will not be discussed

Okay, that’s all I got. I’ll see you and the rest of the Internet tomorrow at 10:00 am PDT to see how I did. Even if I’m wrong about everything, I expect to come out of it pleased!